Did you hear the one about the woman who couldn’t go to work because her chickens’ feet were frozen to the driveway? It’s not a joke — it’s an actual excuse given to a boss.
Gone are the days when an employee called in sick and coughed a little to make the story believable. Today, workers give a variety of excuses when they stay home from the office. And they’re doing it a lot.
Almost one-third of employees admitted to calling in sick to work last year even though they weren’t ill, according to CareerBuilder.com’s annual survey. Fortunately for them, 75 percent of employers believe their employees are sick when they say they are.
But some bosses aren’t falling for it.
Thirty-five percent of employers checked up on their supposedly sick employees. The majority (67 percent) of those suspicious bosses demanded a note from the doctor. A determined 14 percent actually drove by the employee’s home.
So what should you tell your boss if you need a rest but there’s not a holiday in sight?
Honesty is the best policy, says Rosemary Haefner, vice president of human resources for CareerBuilder.com. “If you’re a strong employee and you’re truthful about the time you need off, your employer is likely to give it to you.” But if you get caught in a lie, you risk your reputation and possibly even your job.
Luckily, many employers are beginning to understand that an employee doesn’t have to be suffering from the flu to need a day off. Mental health days, which allow employees to stay home from work to escape the stress and chaos of the office, are gaining acceptance in the workplace. Sixty-nine percent of surveyed employers consider mental health days acceptable uses of sick leave.
“Employers are placing a greater emphasis on work/life balance, offering more opportunities for employees to recharge and return to the office more productive,” Haefner says.
So the next time you call in sick — whether you have the flu or a desire to stay in your pajamas until noon — you can decide if you want to tell the truth or a little white lie. If you choose the latter, here are some of the most unusual excuses bosses revealed.
1. At her sister’s wedding, an employee chipped her tooth on a mint julep, bent over to spit it out, hit her head on a keg and was knocked unconscious.
2. While at a circus, a tiger urinated on the employee’s ear, causing an ear infection.
3. An employee’s dog wasn’t feeling well, so the employee tasted the dog’s food and then got sick.
4. “Someone put LSD in my salad.”
5. An employee’s roommate locked all his clothes in a shed for spite.
6. “Stuck on an island – canoe floated away.”
7. An employee was upset because his favorite "American Idol" contestant was voted off.
8. “I didn’t think I had to come in if I had time in my vacation bank. I thought I could take it whenever I wanted.”
9. An employee said he wasn’t feeling well and wanted to rest up for the company’s holiday party that night.
10. A groundhog bit the employee’s car tire, causing it to go flat.
Isn't it strange how a 20 dollar bill seems like such a large amount when you donate it to church , but such a small amount when you go shopping? Isn't it strange how 2 hours seem so long when you're at church, and how short they seem when you're watching a good movie? Isn't it strange that you can't find a word to say when you're praying but... you have no trouble thinking what to talk about with a friend? Isn't it strange how difficult and boring it is to read one chapter of the Bible but how easy it is to read a real good magazine? Isn't it strange how everyone wants front-row-tickets to concerts or games but they do whatever is possible to sit at the last row in Church? Isn't it strange how we need to know about an event for Church 2-3 weeks before the day so we can include it in our agenda, but we can adjust it for other events in the last minute? Isn't it strange how difficult it is to learn a fact about God to share it with others; but how easy it is to learn, understand, extend and repeat gossip? Isn't it strange how we believe everything that magazines and newspapers say but . we question the words in the Bible? Isn't it strange how everyone wants a place in heaven but... they don't want to believe, do, or say anything to get there? Isn't it strange how we send jokes in e-mails and they are forwarded right away but when we are going to send messages about God, We delete them without sparing a time to look at them. Always Remember, God(the lord),and Jeasus come first!
Be S T U P I D: 1. Ask For Directions To A Place You're Already At. 2. Try To Order Pizza From McDonald's. 3. Get Hit By A Parked Car. 4. Try To Watch Saturday Afternoon Cartoons On A Thursday. 5. Try To Sell Your Money. 6. Try To Play The Alphabet On The Piano. 7. Eat All You Can Eat At A Store. 8. Get Into A Fight With Yourself And Lose. 9. Try To Go Swimming Without Getting Wet. 10. Ask For Diet Water At A Restaurant 11.look for a sugar free label on a packet of sugar 9 things I have to prove people are so smart NOT me eat to mannny bowlz of stopid yesterday morning!!!??
1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time....I mean I know where my watch is pal, where the heck is yours? Do I point at my butt when I ask where the toilet is?
2. People who are willing to get off their but to search the entire room for the T.V. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.
3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Heck right! What good is cake if you can't eat it? I mean come on people
4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the heck would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna slap em!!
5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No stupid, I paid $12 to come to the theater and stare at the floor come on,DUH.
6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?
7. When something is 'new and improved!' Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before, it couldn't be new.
8. When people say "life is short". What the heck?? Life is the longest dang thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?
9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, stupid? some people are just not the sharpest tool in the shed By, Tom boy18
Isn't it strange how a 20 dollar bill seems like such a large amount when you donate it to church , but such a small amount when you go shopping? Isn't it strange how 2 hours seem so long when you're at church, and how short they seem when you're watching a good movie? Isn't it strange that you can't find a word to say when you're praying but... you have no trouble thinking what to talk about with a friend? Isn't it strange how difficult and boring it is to read one chapter of the Bible but how easy it is to read a real good magazine? Isn't it strange how everyone wants front-row-tickets to concerts or games but they do whatever is possible to sit at the last row in Church? Isn't it strange how we need to know about an event for Church 2-3 weeks before the day so we can include it in our agenda, but we can adjust it for other events in the last minute? Isn't it strange how difficult it is to learn a fact about God to share it with others; but how easy it is to learn, understand, extend and repeat gossip? Isn't it strange how we believe everything that magazines and newspapers say but . we question the words in the Bible? Isn't it strange how everyone wants a place in heaven but... they don't want to believe, do, or say anything to get there? Isn't it strange how we send jokes in e-mails and they are forwarded right away but when we are going to send messages about God,
Isn't it strange how a 20 dollar bill seems like such a large amount when you donate it to church , but such a small amount when you go shopping? Isn't it strange how 2 hours seem so long when you're at church, and how short they seem when you're watching a good movie? Isn't it strange that you can't find a word to say when you're praying but... you have no trouble thinking what to talk about with a friend? Isn't it strange how difficult and boring it is to read one chapter of the Bible but how easy it is to read a real good magazine? Isn't it strange how everyone wants front-row-tickets to concerts or games but they do whatever is possible to sit at the last row in Church? Isn't it strange how we need to know about an event for Church 2-3 weeks before the day so we can include it in our agenda, but we can adjust it for other events in the last minute? Isn't it strange how difficult it is to learn a fact about God to share it with others; but how easy it is to learn, understand, extend and repeat gossip? Isn't it strange how we believe everything that magazines and newspapers say but . we question the words in the Bible? Isn't it strange how everyone wants a place in heaven but... they don't want to believe, do, or say anything to get there? Isn't it strange how we send jokes in e-mails and they are forwarded right away but when we are going to send messages about God,
Gone are the days when an employee called in sick and coughed a little to make the story believable. Today, workers give a variety of excuses when they stay home from the office. And they’re doing it a lot.
Almost one-third of employees admitted to calling in sick to work last year even though they weren’t ill, according to CareerBuilder.com’s annual survey. Fortunately for them, 75 percent of employers believe their employees are sick when they say they are.
But some bosses aren’t falling for it.
Thirty-five percent of employers checked up on their supposedly sick employees. The majority (67 percent) of those suspicious bosses demanded a note from the doctor. A determined 14 percent actually drove by the employee’s home.
So what should you tell your boss if you need a rest but there’s not a holiday in sight?
Honesty is the best policy, says Rosemary Haefner, vice president of human resources for CareerBuilder.com. “If you’re a strong employee and you’re truthful about the time you need off, your employer is likely to give it to you.” But if you get caught in a lie, you risk your reputation and possibly even your job.
Luckily, many employers are beginning to understand that an employee doesn’t have to be suffering from the flu to need a day off. Mental health days, which allow employees to stay home from work to escape the stress and chaos of the office, are gaining acceptance in the workplace. Sixty-nine percent of surveyed employers consider mental health days acceptable uses of sick leave.
“Employers are placing a greater emphasis on work/life balance, offering more opportunities for employees to recharge and return to the office more productive,” Haefner says.
So the next time you call in sick — whether you have the flu or a desire to stay in your pajamas until noon — you can decide if you want to tell the truth or a little white lie. If you choose the latter, here are some of the most unusual excuses bosses revealed.
1. At her sister’s wedding, an employee chipped her tooth on a mint julep, bent over to spit it out, hit her head on a keg and was knocked unconscious.
2. While at a circus, a tiger urinated on the employee’s ear, causing an ear infection.
3. An employee’s dog wasn’t feeling well, so the employee tasted the dog’s food and then got sick.
4. “Someone put LSD in my salad.”
5. An employee’s roommate locked all his clothes in a shed for spite.
6. “Stuck on an island – canoe floated away.”
7. An employee was upset because his favorite "American Idol" contestant was voted off.
8. “I didn’t think I had to come in if I had time in my vacation bank. I thought I could take it whenever I wanted.”
9. An employee said he wasn’t feeling well and wanted to rest up for the company’s holiday party that night.
10. A groundhog bit the employee’s car tire, causing it to go flat.